I used to tease my brother about his old age when he reached thirty. And now here I am, today exactly.

Several things have happened since I graduated from university—I started freelance writing and have evolved that practice since then, finished my Master’s degree, went on my first out-of-the-country trip and even more travels after that, closed down my business of 8 years that I put up when I was 16, launched our relationship slash lifestyle blog, switched jobs a total of five times, got a dog finally, got engaged then married, and many many more.

Who I was ten years ago is so much different from who I am now. Heck, even three years ago, I was a different person. People around me were supportive, but there were several things I wished I knew (or believed) when I was younger.

  • Don’t compromise on your principles. Don’t lower your standards to meet someone else’s definition of it, especially for things that will go against your principles. Not even for peer pressure.
  • People grow apart and that’s okay. Not everyone who comes into your life will stay, and there’s nothing wrong with that. People part ways and it doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you or them.
  • Stop overthinking. Thinking is fine, but overthinking isn’t. You’ll encounter a lot of situations where you’ll feel the urge to look deeper into things when you shouldn’t. A lot of times it’s all in your head and you’re only making it difficult for yourself.
  • Whatever it is, it’s gonna get better. You’ll be sad, you’ll probably be angry, or cry, or irritated. But it’s always going to get better, guaranteed.
  • It’s okay to sulk, then get back up. Someday when you get older, you’ll realize that you need to let your emotions take over once in a while. And once that’s done, you pick yourself back up and face it.
  • You don’t always have to do it alone. You don’t always have to rely on only yourself all the time. And it’s okay to ask for help or support.
  • Success is different for everyone, and it’s not a race. Your definition of success is different from others and there’s nothing wrong with it. Also no one is taking notes so there’s no rush on when you’ll get there! In your case—a house with your own kitchen island.
  • Save, save, save! Start early. It’s okay to buy things for yourself from time to time and spoil yourself to heal childhood traumas, but make sure to regularly save up for a rainy day as early as you can.
  • Enjoy the days when you have a faster metabolism. Yes, it’s gonna be tougher to eat 2 or more cups of rice and not feel it in your belly when you’re older. Enjoy it now!
  • Drink water and eat healthier. Don’t wait until 2020 before drinking more than a cup of water daily (True story!). It’ll make you feel so much better. Also eat healthier and less fast food and ready-to-cook stuff. They’re full of preservatives and sodium!
  • Stop comparing yourself to others. Everyone has their own strenghts and weaknesses so stop comparing what you can and can’t do against others. Keep working on yourself and appreciate all the small things.
  • Care less about what other people think. People think so much less about you than you think. Your character (who you are) is more important than your reputation (what others may think of you).
  • Don’t worry about things you can’t control. You won’t always be in an ideal position and that’s okay. Worry less about things that are beyond your control because the reality is, it’s not all the time you can do something about everything.
  • Enforce your boundaries. What you experience is what you allow. Don’t be afraid to enforce your boundaries if you are uncomfortable, regardless of what society may say.
  • Pick out anything you can learn from everything and everyone around you. The world is an unlimited library. You’ll learn new things from basically anything, anyone, everything, and everyone, when you choose to look beyond what is expected. Even just hearing how other people present for work, or someone talking about their life story, you’ll pick up a thing or two that you may be able to apply elsewhere.
  • Sunk cost fallacy is a thing. Stop dwelling on past decisions. It’s probably the best choice at the time with the knowledge that you have. Plus there’s nothing you can do about it anymore. Cut losses. Take it as a lesson.
  • Balance your wants and needs. I know you always felt like you were deprived of things when you were younger. When you start to afford your wants more, make sure to balance it with your needs. If you can buy it, doesn’t mean that you should.
  • Communicate better. That includes being honest and open, but polite and kind. It also means don’t assume someone understands you because you sent “signs.” If you want something, say it, because nobody “just knows.” It’ll save you a lot of heartache, headache, and unmet expectations.
  • If it isn’t yes, then it’s no. If it’s not a sure yes, it’s likely a no. Be picky about what you spend your time and energy on.
  • Shut your mouth when angry or too emotional. We both know about your sharp tongue so avoid saying things you don’t mean when you’re at the height of your emotions. You might not be able to take it back.
  • Pay it forward. From the movie of the same title you watched in elementary. Look back to the times people helped you. Don’t forget to do the same when you can. It doesn’t have to be financial, but any form of help you can extend can go a long way. And, make sure no strings attached.

My twenty-year-old self would be proud of me as a thirty-year-old. I’ve learned so much, experienced a lot, and definitely matured into a much better person. I’ll soon be out of the calendar, but here’s to more years of growing up and growing old.

Cheers to being thirty!